Jessica’s Self Care Day and Bye Don! 7 November 2020

7 November 2013 was the worst day of my life, a day where my life was almost cut short. I believe in Guardian Angels and I had one that night. Last year I had a self-care day in Philadelphia when I got tattoo #2. I decided to have a self-care day in Philadelphia this year, but instead of a tattoo I’d get a piercing. I couldn’t wait to hang out with my favourite piercing shop.

I was waiting for the bus when I read the news that Joe Biden was elected as president! I had a happy cry. The same Guardian Angel I had on 7 November 2013, was here today and there were 3 more added: Justice Ruth Ginsburg, Senator McCain and Senator John Lewis. On 7 November 2020, the man who bragged about grabbing women by the pussy and who has been accused of assault was fired and it was fitting for what my day was celebrating already.

When I arrived in Philadelphia, I got off the bus to such joy and kindness. I joined in the celebrations until my appointment. What a wonderful day. America, kindness has returned to the White House! 


I’ve said the following on Instagram and I’ll say the same here: Regardless of where we are, we are all Americans. We are all humans in this world. We should stand together and treat each other with the utmost kindness. It doesn’t matter who is in the White House, kindness and empathy never change. Our humanity never changes. If you’re God fearing, God doesn’t change. Whatever you believe in doesn’t change. Love and kindness, that’s all it is.

After, I walked down to South Street and had lunch at Red Hook Cafe. That is my favourite spot and where I had lunch last year before my tattoo. It was fitting to go before my piercing. Since I was having dinner in the city, I went for a cheap lunch: salad. So good.

After a quick lunch, I headed to Infinite. I’ve been a faithful client of there’s since May 2011. That’s why I wanted to go and I knew I would be spending the afternoon with good people that usually uplift me.

My appointment was for 2:30, but with COVID-19 restrictions, I was let in 10 minutes later because they were at their limit. Once people left, I was allowed in, they sanitized the counter and I was able to pick my jewelry. I was going to go with either a snug or orbital. A piercer came out to look at my ear, my ear is too flat for a snug, but an orbital was perfect. I picked out a golden trinity piece.

I had to wait 10 more minutes. John was my piercer and after he finished with someone going back to India, he sanitized his room and he brought me back. We talked about what this day signifies for me and I told him last year I got a tattoo on my lower back. He laughed and said, “I guess that pain is good for a painful memory.” I said, “it didn’t hurt at all, it felt great.” “Oh, piercing feels great to you too, then!” I laughed, “yep.”

I laid down, took a deep breath in, then out and 15 minutes later I had a new piercing. Before I left his studio, John agreed to a selfie. That made me so happy. The way John and the entire Infinite staff treated me yesterday, it made my self-care day even better. I knew that would happen because after the case was dropped, I went there and they comforted, then they comforted me before my liver tests and after. They’re great people.

After, I went ice skating and then dinner at Barra Rossa. I had gluten-free penna a la vodka and gluten-free bread. It was a delicious meal that celebrated me.

Happy 1st anniversary, tattoo #2. Old City Tattoo really made last year special and can’t wait to spend time with them in 2021! When I got home, I sang “Happy Inkday” and “Happy Renewal of Life!”

I had a wonderful self-care day and while it was different than last year’s, I’m glad there was such a jovial mood yesterday. It felt great to be around happy people and this has been the happiest I’ve seen people in a long time.

I will never forget what happened to me, I am forgiving what has happened to me. I am grateful for the life I was given and I am grateful for the second chance. I am healing because for when I was weak, I was strong. Through this pain and through this experience, I was able to start this project and I was able to inspire others. While I would never wish what happened to me, I feel indebted to what this experience has allowed me to do with my life.

I have been playing this video a lot in the past few weeks and I want to reshare it:

Published by


Creator of the Happiness Box Project Initiative, a project where you write your happiness or gratitude each day, then open the box in the New Year. The Initiative is to teach joy and gratitude, to pass it on to others.

One thought on “Jessica’s Self Care Day and Bye Don! 7 November 2020”

  1. Hi, Jessica Marie!

    I am verklempt after reading about your day of self care and empowerment. You turned sadness into joy as you found meaningful ways to negotiate the anniversary of a traumatic experience in your life. I am proud of you. The election of Joe Biden certainly gave all of us a boost. We can breathe easier knowing that the presidency will soon be in infinitely more capable and trusted hands. The timing was excellent for you to arrive in Philly the same morning that fine city put Mr. Biden over the top and gave him the win. The pictures you took tell the happy story. You were there to witness and take part in one of the most exciting and consequential turning points in our nation’s history. It’s great to see American flags waving without having to cringe. Over the last four years, racists and hate groups have been turned our flag into a symbol of hate. On Saturday, the flag once again became a symbol of unity, liberty, justice and opportunity for people of all races and religions throughout our country. Mrs. Shady and I are still celebrating and world leaders are messaging: “Welcome back America!” Indeed.

    Adding Justice Ruth Ginsburg, Senator McCain and Senator John Lewis to your roster of guardian angels is an excellent idea. In NLP we have a thing called a “board of directors.” Pick people, living or dead, who have inspired you along the way and keep them in your mind ready to be consulted on any difficult matter or decision that might arise. Conduct yourself as they would have in a similar situation. Keep learning from them and letting them counsel and guide you.

    Congratulations on getting a piercing from John at Infinite. Whenever you look at it, let it give you strength and hope. Lunch prior at Red Hook, dinner at Barra and ice skating in between. What a wonderful day with the Biden victory celebration as the backdrop. I join you in singing happy inkday to tat #2 as well. So many things to be thankful for. Thank for posting the TED talk about reframing – taking the traumas in your life and turning them into “a narrative of triumph.” “Forge meaning and build identity.” That’s what you are doing, dear friend.

    Have a great week, JM!


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